The NYC Subway really grinds my gears.

So...picture this.

It's 7:30 a.m. You're standing in a dingy subway that vaguely smells of urine and damp dog, waiting for the train. One very devoted musician is standing at a platform across from you blowing on his bagpipe feeling that his music is so beautiful, therefore it is appropriate to play it at this hour in the morning.  And, did you notice it always seems to be the same tune blaring out of the plaid printed instrument.  You know...the tune you automatically associate with Ireland and Scotland?

The train finally arrives and you can't wait to sit down.  EXCEPT it's packed like a sardine can, and though you believed wearing three sweaters, stockings, two pairs of pants, and a woolen hat were a smart way to fight the cold weather in NY, you are now dripping with sweat against the body heat of your fellow New Yorkers (who incidentally all seem to have a bad case of halitosis this morning).  You reach for the germ infested pole to steady yourself and your massive purse, but quickly pull away as three other clammy passengers' hands awkwardly slide down on to your own.

You come to the Time Square stop and breathe a sigh of relief as the train empties out and you finally find a seat. You sit next to a greasy looking little man who is sleeping.  You notice someone takes the seat next to you.  It is an older woman with crazy looking hair who smells as if she spritzed herself with body odor and garbage.  Isn't it strange how foul smelling people on the train always seem to be "not all there".  She's murmuring something to herself inaudibly as she stares off into the distance, and though you can't quite make it out you swear it's some sort of crazy Mayan magic spell.

The gentleman next to you is starting to lean your way in his deep slumber.  He does the heavy lidded rocking back and forth motion, between dozing off repeatedly and jerking awake.  Suddenly the train slows down and comes to a halt.  There's an announcement over the train's intercom: "We are delayed due to train traffic ahead of us."  The delay lasts about 25 mins.

You finally reach your destination and find out later that day that once again, the train fare has been raised.  "Thank you for riding the MTA."